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Attention Women - Wait to Have Sex With Him

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Written by Sarah Love

Thursday, 20 March 2008

by SarahLove

Every woman has to face the question at some point in a relationship, "When is it ok to have sex with him?" There is no exact answer to that question, naturally, but there are certainly some guidelines that can help you figure that out.

There are guidelines, though, as to what you can do to avoid getting hurt. There are many scenarios around this delicate question, but here are three of the most common mistakes women make when approaching it:

1. You trick yourself into thinking that it means the same thing to him. You believe he wants a relationship because he wants to sleep with you.

2. You don't tell him what having sex means to you because you think it will be an awkward or embarrassing situation.

3. Not being sure of exactly WHAT you feel - and you let yourself be pulled along by the heat of the moment, then berate yourself later for giving in.

Now what happens when a man is made to WAIT to have sex with you? Good things happen in these circumstances - because he is forced to value you not for your body - but for who you are. Not how you make him feel physically.

Having sex in the beginning of a relationship may just allow him to value you only for that, and not even get IN to the rest of you. He may see you only as a great time, and you will never know otherwise because some people can be very charming when they want something.

We, as women, are not immune to this either. Sometimes we feel such a physical connection to a man that we make the mistake of sleeping with him too soon. Then, we become attached, as the sexual experience to most women totally belongs INSIDE a relationship, and by having sex, we feel we are now IN the relationship. Even though he may disagree.

Therefore, it is very advisable to wait until the relationship has actually become a real "relationship", as agreed to on both sides, before proceeding with the physical aspects of it. This way, you do not feel like you are involved in a relationship while he feels no such thing, and it saves you from being hurt, feeling disconnected from him and left high and dry as far as your expectations are concerned.

Or - if you still want to begin a sexual relationship with him - talk to him first about what this means to you. TELL him how you feel - that having sex means that you are in a bonafide relationship. If he does not feel the same way, or he freaks out because you said the "R" word - you know he is not the man for you.

There are definite benefits to waiting to have sex with a man until your relationship is established. Waiting helps make sure you really do have a relationship to begin with, saving you from hurt, embarrassment, and other complications of sexual relationships that can be much more serious.

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Dating tips for Women ONLY from Christian Carter of Catch Him and Keep Him