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How Are You Going To Propose?

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Written by Marie Wilson

Wednesday, 26 March 2008

by MarieWilson

If you talked to a lot of people in successful marriages, the variety of ways, places and styles that they got engaged is just amazing. But two approaches to getting engaged seem to dominate. The first style involves a situation where the man pops the question out of the blue with no preparation because he is swept away with her charms. The second style is the one we see in movies the most where the guy is totally prepared and planned out how he is going to ask the girl of his dreams to marry him.

So what is ideal if you have it in your mind to propose is the best of both types of engagements? You want the feeling of spontaneity and romance so your lover is also overwhelmed with the emotion but you want the advantages of planning ahead so you are in complete control of how you pop this very important question, even if you are not completely in control of her answer.

When planning the big night you will step from the world of bachelorhood to engagement, the basics are important. And the basics include the actual words of your proposal of marriage to your girl. The default is the tried and true, "Will you marry me". So you can always fall back to that in a pinch. The other extreme that you see sometimes in movies are guys who have a speech that goes on and on and on before finally just telling your girl you want her to be your wife. So don't overlook the actual words you want to say when you are planning the date, whether the ring will be part of the surprise and the dozens of other details of this night of nights.

Before you put together the actual words you are going to say to ask for her hand in marriage, it might be best to decide if the proposal will be a total surprise or if you will set the date up so she is very aware of what is going to happen. For example, if you get dressed up, make it a particularly romantic date and are going to go with the well known kneeling and presenting the ring approach, the traditional "Will you marry me?" may be just right.

But keep in mind that this will be a moment she will cherish for the rest of her life and the story of the night you and she pledged to become lovers for life will be repeated in stories to friends and even to your kids and grandkids for as long as you two are together. Keep in mind also that you will probably be a little nervous so you don't want your planned speech to be so flowery and elegant that it isn't even how you talk.

If the way you speak your love for your girl at this special moment are well selected, it will be a moment that will take your relationship to a deeper place, which is what you want. Now, don't be surprised if emotions well up when its time to ask the big question because you obviously care deeply for her and its going to come out. And when that happens, a simple four word question can turn into a lengthy bearing of your soul. Think about what you should do if you feel the words pouring out because when she figures out that this is "it", she is going to be dying for you to get to the big question. So writing out what you want to say is a good way to prepare something to fall back on when the time is here.

But a creative and romantic phrasing of this important question can make those words sound to her just as poetic and eternal as anything Shakespeare might write. You can use variations on the simple question that makes it more personal and emotional. Making the question personal with your own phrasing like "I would be the proudest man on earth if you were my wife" are just the thing to make this moment the most romantic one she will ever experience.

You are giving yourself the advantage by thinking ahead how you want to ask the love of your life to be in your life forever. And by thinking it through and making the exact words a perfect expression of your feelings and the love you share together, it will be a proposal of marriage that will be sure to cause the response you want which will be an enthusiastic and kisses filled answer of YES!

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You can find more creative & romantic ways to propose at Topdateideas.com.

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