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Online Personal Ads - Talking to the Opposite Sex |
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Written by Jay Reiss, M.S.W.
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Thursday, 17 July 2008 |
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As an Online Dating Coach, I read a lot of Internet personal ads that - quite frankly - surprise me! Some of the guys who write Online Personal Ads seem to be writing ads that are designed to sell used cars. And from the women? I often see personal ads that even low-end mail order catalogs would refuse.
by JayReiss,M.S.W.
As an Online Dating Coach, I read a lot of Internet personal ads that - quite frankly - surprise me! Some of the guys who write Online Personal Ads seem to be writing ads that are designed to sell used cars. And from the women? I often see personal ads that even low-end mail order catalogs would refuse.
Here's one example. This ad was submitted by a woman in her early 40's -
professional who enjoys open conversation - 41
"I love to talk about books that have struck you bizarre or interesting. I do want someone to hang out with, and must enjoy talking about politics, books, places and wine. Must love chocolate!"
We can immediately see that this woman likes to communicate (and that's a good thing, yes?) and she also enjoys "talking about everything" - including "books that have struck you bizarre." (Are we talking about Stephen King novels here?) In addition to that, it would be great if you (as a guy) can talk about "politics, places, and wine" - but the main thing is that you love chocolate?
With an online dating ad like the ad above, I can only imagine the types of guys who'd reply!
Or - take a look at this online personal ad, from a 29-year-old guy who describes himself as a "Tattoo Teddy Bear" --
tattoo teddy bear - 29
"i just want a good girl that knows how to treat a man with respect."
This online dating ad gets right to the point, doesn't it.
It's at moments like this when I can really understand why men and women just don't understand each other!
One of the most important concepts I'd like to convey is this: When you sit down to write your Online Dating Ads, always write them just like you're having a regular conversation!
In other words, here is a list of what to avoid:
1. Don't write your ad so it sounds like advertising copy from a magazine.
2. Never condescend to your audience!
3. Never write a short (one or two sentence) ad. You just can't say enough in a short ad to really "sell" yourself properly!
Instead, here are some of the things that you absolutely should be doing --
1. Talk about yourself in terms of who you are as a person, what you enjoy doing on a date, and list some of your hobbies and interests.
2. Using colorful, imaginative language, and paint a picture of how she or he will feel when you're together on a date. Use examples, anticipate questions, and be upbeat and optimistic. Give your reader a sense of what being with you is like - and describe that in some detail when writing your dating ad.
3. Talk about some of your best qualities. (Are you warm and friendly? A good listener? Are you compassionate and understanding?)
4. What's the benefit (i.e., the "payoff") for answering your ad right now? And finally...
5. Last but not least - use a spell-checker and make sure that both your spelling and your grammar are correct before your ad is published!
By following these tips and guidelines, you'll be on your way to a successful online dating campaign!
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