Ten Steps to Battle Teen Peer Pressure

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Ten Steps to Battle Teen Peer Pressure

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Written by Catherine Ann

Sunday, 13 April 2008

by CatherineAnn

Skinned knees, dirty bedrooms, sibling rivalry. As a mother of 5, I thought that I had encountered every possible problem, but I could not have been more wrong. These problems were so easy to deal with compared to what I am facing now.

As of a few days ago, I have a teenager! Now the problems are much more difficult. Raising young children is easy. If something goes wrong, all you have to do is give them a few kisses, a quick hug, and maybe a few minutes on mom or dad's lap.

The issues that face teenagers, drugs, alcohol abuse, teen pregnancy, smoking, aren't quite so easy to solve. These problems need a well thought out plan to address their many complexities.

Prior to their teenage years, we spend a lot of time teaching our kids right from wrong. As your kids, figuring out what is right and what is wrong isn't so easy. It takes a lot of preparation and a lot of coaching from you. Teen peer pressures can distorte the viewpoint of even the best kid. Here are several strategies you can use to address teen peer pressure.

1. I want to know who I am?: Your teens friends are really important to him or her because they help your teen figure out who they are and what they stand for. That's not always a bad thing, but you want to be big influence in this area also. Spend time talking to your teen about what they believe in. Get them to say it out loud. Once they can verbalize what they stand for, it gets easier to make the right decision. When faced with an unclear decision, they should ask themselves, how does this compare to what I want to be?

2. Know what you are getting into: Any time your teen leaves the house, make sure that the both of you know what you are getting into. Ask as many questions as you need to until you are both comfortable that your teen will be safe. This is not the time to be shy.

3. Know what questions to ask: Make sure your teen has a good arsenal of questions to ask their friends to find out what will be going on. Who will there? Are there parents there? Will there be alcohol or drugs there? It might be embarrassing the first time for your teen, but make sure they understand that their safety is more important than a slight bit of embarrassment.

4. HELP is just a phone call away!!!!: Your teen may find himself or herself in a situation that they know you would not approve of. Make sure they know that they can call you for help no matter what situation they find themselves in. Your teen needs to feel confident that they can count on you when they need you most.

5. Practice, practice, practice: Role playing can seem a bit goofy at times, but it will really give your teens the necessary skills they need later. Pretend you are one of your teen's best friends and really try to convince him to do something he shouldn't. Be as persistent as another teen would and really put the pressure on your teen.

6. Make me the bad guy: Your teen is most likely afraid of looking like a "goody two shoes", even though they may want to do the right thing. Tell your teen it's ok to blame you. Have them try "No way, my dad would kill me if I did that. It's not worth it". It's likely that their friends will be able accept that excuse.

7. What is a "real friend": Ask your teen why a good friend would ask them to do something that they were uncomfortable with. Your teen should examine the motives of that "friend". Maybe they really aren't a friend.

8. What is cool?: Ask your teen to make a list of 5 people from the real world that they think are cool. Chances are that they will choose someone from the music or entertainment industry (If the choose you, this is going to be easy). Find out from your teen what about this person is cool. Point out to your teen that these characteristics that your teen thinks are so cool weren't developed by doing what everyone else is doing. Being cool is about doing what you want to do, not following the crowd.

9. My confidence is growing: As parents, we have to work hard at staying positive. Sometimes we get so focused on getting things done, and what isn't getting done, that we forget about spending quality time with our kids. It is incredibly important to let all of our kids, but especially our teens, to know how important they are to us. Our teens are feeling very unsure about themselves and they are looking to us to build their confidence. Let them know how you feel about them. If there is another adult around, let your teen "overhear" you bragging about them. It will really give them a boost!

10. We are family: The best defense you can give your teen against peer pressure is a strong family foundation. Make sure your teen knows they can always count on their family to be there when they need them. Make plenty of time for family fun!

Raising a teen is tough. They are facing some really difficult issues as are you. You will both make mistakes. Make the mistakes out of love, not pride or stubbornness and always be willing to forgive each other.

About the Author:

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